We obviously didnt make it to Vegas until 12:30, but even so, we proceeded to get shit house and wreak havok. We met up with Joel, our buddy from Vegas that owns a HUGE mansion in Vegas and throws adult parties (more on that later). He took us to a hookah bar where we smoked hook and drank crown on the rocks to the wee hours of the night, or early morning.
Saturday begun and we got to do it, finally.....go to the AVN convention. We got their at about 1:00 pm as the convention ran 12-6 that day and we decided to show up fashionably late. Little did we know the cluster fuck that would ensue. It took us....i kid you not..... an hour and a half to get into the actual convention because of how busy it was. But we got in, and immediatley i was blessed with meeting Teanna Kai:
I was nervous to say the least especially after i grabbed her flyer and was reaching for another one she told me that it was just the backside of the one i already took. Whoops. We rolled around downstairs for a little while longer, but it was a small area and not much really going on. Worried that we had pumped it up to much and were inevitably going to be let down, we moved on upstairs, which was the other section of the convention.Holy crap, this was seriously just like that one scene in "The Girl Next Door".
It was pretty crowded and about the size of 8 football fields. We were lost in a sea of smut, and it was awesome.I met some more random asian chicks along the way, and had a few strange encounters. For one, even though this was a porn convention, no chicks were naked, or flashing boobs or anything. Their was no nudity....period. Obviously some videos were showing porn, but they were only allowed to show women naked no hardcore stuff. So the experience was surreal in the fact that even though it was a convention for pornography, everyone for the most part was very business like. Which leads me to my strangest encounter.
I was at some booth and they gave me a calendar for 2006. So they had girls set up to sign their assigned month and so forth. So, even though i thought the chick was ugly, i got her to sign the calendar. She looks at me with a straight look of bordem and says "Who do i make it out to?" To which i reply "Uhhh Bones, like you know Bones in your body or whatever" (which i repeated numerous times that day). So she flip's the calendar open (which i had not looked at yet) to her month, and as she begins to write i look down at the calendar, and saw the picture for her month and it's some chick spitting cum into the girl who's signing my calendar's mouth. I look at her as she's writing like she's fucking crazy, and as she finishes she just looks at me dead pan and just says here you go, like she's selling me fucking groceries or something. I could'nt believe she could just sign it like it was fucking nothing, no facial expressions just whatever. And here's the kicker. As i was walking away i looked at what she wrote and this is what it said "Bones- I'm the filthiest whore you'll ever meet love, Kat". She definitly didnt seem like it.
Anyways, we also got to meet this awesome dude called Evan Stone that does softcore like skinemax and hardcore i guess, and Ernesto and i decided the moment we took this picture that we were in his fanclub for life
And as we finally were going to leave, we ran into the one man that could bring the perfect day to a close. Ron Jeremy
We left at 6 and had definitely had our fill. Still recovering from shock and awe, we drove to Joel's house for the AVN after party we were to attend.Of course, at this point we already had seen enough hot chicks for a lifetime, but a couple more would'nt hurt. The house is 2 stories, with the "living quarters" upstairs and the "club" downstairs. The club part of the house is 22,000 square feet, has a dance floor, dj booth, bar, movie theatre, pool and ping pong tables, numerous projectors showing music videos on the walls and EIGHT adjoining bedrooms for whoever needs to "use them". We weren't really allowed to take pictures during the party, but here's what the place looked like
The party was obviously interesting. We met a porn star called Black Magic, as well as some other cool peep's. The night at least for me is quite fuzzy to say the least, but we hung out, danced, and got into some trouble. I looked in my phone, and from what i have gathered, we went to sleep at 6, and this was the last pic of the night
We woke up severly hung over at around 11 and peaced out of Vegas. The ride home sucked, but we actually did something we had always said we would do. We stopped at Whiskey Pete's and went to the buffet.
Besides that, we argued about how Brex invents parts of conversations, talked about how often we though porn stars actually work, and debated the meaning of life. Overall it was a great trip. Check out me Flickr account for more pics
hope you didn't shake ron's hand. think about where it's been.
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